My guess is that you are probably a reasonable person, but some of your coworkers and customers can be demanding, picky, angry, and whiny.

One of my favorite books is entitled, “Dealing with People You Can’t Stand” written by Dr. Rick Brinkman and Dr. Rick Kirschner. The book claims that we all have four intentions in the workplace; to get it done, get it right, get along, and get appreciation.

When someone wants to get it done, you should focus on the task and your communications should be brief and to the point.

When someone wants to get it right, you should focus on the details, every “i” dotted and every “t” crossed, and your reports are well-documented.

When people want to get along, you should focus on the relationship, and you should engage in considerate conversations and friendly chit-chat.

When someone wants to get appreciation, of course you should recognize their contributions with words of gratitude.

The problem with difficult people is we don’t like them, and we might drag our feet and bite our tongue. We might be contributing to the problem.

So, when people worry things may not get done, they become more controlling. When people fear things will be done wrong, they become more perfectionistic. When people feel left out, they become more approval-seeking. When people don’t get appreciation, they become more attention-seeking.

At work we all want to get it done, whatever it is. And if we are going to do it; we might as well do it well, and it sure would be nice if we could get along. Finally, wouldn’t be nice to get some appreciation. Hey, try this: If you’re not getting it, start giving it.

If you need to find a keynote speaker, plenary speaker, breakout speaker, concurrent session speaker, seminar leader, or workshop facilitator who can deliver in-person, virtually, or via prerecorded session, Kit Welchlin, M.A., CSP, CVP, is a nationally recognized professional motivational speaker and author and can be found at www.welchlin.com or www.SeminarsOnStress.com.